Switching It Up, Married Life, Work

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Switching It Up

I'm not getting any bigger. It's time to face that fact. Well, at least not without a trainer and some steroids. I have tried pretty much all the legal stuff that everyone swears works and yeah, it does, but only so much. As I approach my 35th birthday, I think it's time I accept that my body is not going to be a giant mass of muscle. I'm at 180, and that's about the limit to the amount of bulk my  5'6.5" body can make happen. I've been through various bulking routines and yes they all work, but no matter how much protein I wolf down or how hard I hit the weights, this is about it.  Can certain body parts get a little more results? Sure, I think a few places have some room left, but overall, I think I've hit the limit. I'm not going to look like Vin Diesel. Just not in the cards.

(I'm not hideous)

So, I've decided to scale it back a bit, focus on toning, on building specific areas I think still have a little bit more room to grow, but I'm not doing the massive muscle build, I'm not buying giant expensive weight gainer protein. At least not now, and if I do return to those things, well, it won't be in the hopes that I can look like Branch Warren. I don't have the time, the money, and I don't think I have the body chemistry for that. I'm fine with that. It's going to be interesting seeing if I can simply maintain roughly the same weight, but change the composition so that my current 21% bodyfat can get under 15%. I think THAT'S much more realistic for my form.  My husband doesn't seem to mind, in fact, when I told him he was actually kinda relieved.

Married Life

(we're the same ring size,
sickening, isn't it?)

Is actually not that much different. Sure, we're doing a lot of paperwork merging our lives together, but we've been together 6 years at this point. If we weren't sure about this we'd be over a long time ago. I do feel a little more "grown up" if that makes any sense. What will be interesting is the next time family introduces us to a new person. I'm not going to be cool about anyone omitting a title, or using "friend" or using a very narrow "safe" interpretation of our relationship(my Mom has introduced us to people as "my boys"). I won't be bitchy, I plan to laugh and say something like "oh you're so silly, this is my husband(I'm his husband), she/he should know, she/he was at our wedding!" I need to remind myself prior to any family occasion that this might come up. In the past it's always caught me off guard and fumbling to figure out what to say. I'm going to practice so that I don't keep letting other people do that. In fact, I may just do the introductions myself.

Work

(speaking of work,
shouldn't you be going there
NOW?)

I lost my job in May, which wasn't completely unexpected. No drama, I didn't get fired. But, when my boss left the company in March/April, so did half my work. I did try to take on more work, different work, but in the end I guess they just didn't see a place for me. Honestly, once my boss left, I started to feel like I didn't really "fit-in" anyway. A friend of mine is a consultant, and so now I'm helping her get her home office and equipment together. Sort of like an operations manager/executive assistant type of situation. I'm freelance, so I kinda get to set my own hours, which is cool and scary. I'm hoping this can work out for at least the summer, as I'm not exactly getting offers left and right, and what's REALLY weird is that I can't get any of my old staffing agencies to acknowledge my existence. I've emailed, I've updated my accounts, and ZERO response.